A difinitive answer at last!

I got some answers this evening. We are not going to have any more IL2. WOO HOO. While some of you may find this a little unnerving, let me explain a little.(Peggy already addressed this in the previous post.) I have reached the point where the balance has tipped from the treatment being beneficial to being detrimental to my health. The kidney doctor is not sure how well my kidneys will bounce back from another dose of IL2, and upon a preliminary look, doesn't see an adverse side effect to my kidneys from the ipilimumab (new drug). So in effect we will not have anymore IL2 because we want to keep my kidneys functioning. The next step is to have a CT Scan done on what would have been our regular schedule, which puts that at the end of July. So the last week of July I will have a scan and see how the tumors are. With any luck and a lot of blessings, they will have kept "stable" or will have shrunk. We are praying for shrinking, but stabilizing will be ok too. If they are stable or have shrunk, we will proceed to a maintenance schedule where I have a scan every 3 to 6 months to monitor existing tumors and check for new ones. If new ones show up or the existing ones start to grow, I will go on the new drug. I am really excited so I may be forgetting stuff here, but right now, I don't really care. If you have questions feel free to post a comment and I will respond to it. Some things I don't know but would be more than happy to find out. Once again, Thank you for the prayers and thoughts, our hearts and prayers go out to you. Merry Christmas and Have a lovely day.
Love Andy.

We are sorry that we have not posted a new blog sooner, however, we just didn't know what to write. Monday we met with Dr. Mcgreggor (kidney doctor). Andy had more blood tests done and then we were told to wait. So, we did. We learned what we already knew. Andy's kidney's have been through major trauma with the Il2 and the other meds that are needed to keep him alive when at Huntsman. This is old news. We also learned that with continued treatments it will progressively get worse for the kidneys and failure is plausible. Also old news. The new news is that Dr. Grossman (oncologist) is leaning toward going to plan B and not finishing out the Il2. We will have the decision made by Thursday at the latest on what we are doing. I know that many of you are feeling alarmed about this information. Let me put it to you this way. We are at the first of probably many crossroads of decisions about Andy's treatments. The question is, "what is worse, the treatment or the disease." I know that the disease would be the first and loudest you all would say, but let me remind you of the very real fact that Andy has stage 4 melanoma. This is a cancer that is in the top 5 most aggressive and non-treatable cancers our society is facing. It is not a matter of if it takes Andy's life, but when. We want as a family to have as much time together on this earth. We also want it to be possible for Andy to be able to function during that time. Right now we face a real possibility that continuing with Il2 will take away a quality of life that we have right now. I don't want to alarm any of you. We pray for and believe that miracles can and do happen, and have seen them frequently happen over the last six months. And that Andy may have that chance to out live most Doctors theories. That is why we look at every possibility and options. For Andy, he is positive and upbeat about the direction the doctors are going. Andy and I personally feel that Dr. Grossman, Dr. Mcgreggor, and all the staff at Huntsman are truly being inspired in Andy's treatments. I hope that all of you that read this do not think I am being depressed or negative. I just what you to know what is going on with treatments and how Andy is progressing. I am comforted by the doctors and their real concern of Andy and his overall well being. To prove my point. If Andy does not go into Huntsman this weekend for treatments. The doctors have said they will wait until we come back from our trip to Florida to continue. They want us as a family to go on this trip and they know that Andy will not be able to go it if there is not enough recovery time between the treatment and the trip. We all feel the Lord's hand in this trial. We feel there is much to learn and we will be given the time to learn it. No one knows their time line in this life. But we all know it will end someday. And we have decided to live and enjoy what beautiful things the Lord has provide us. We have wonderful neighbors that are willing to sacrifice time and energy to help us with things that were at one time very simple for us to accomplish. Cutting, baling, and water the field was the simplest of tasks for Andy, until now. And we are blessed with Bruce Zundel and family, Jay Capner and family, and Rob and Danny, who are our heroes for their help, just to name a few. We love you and appreciate all you do. Thanks to all of you and your prayers. We will see miracles upon miracles as we all progress through this. I feel that the Lord has many things for Andy and I to do still, and cancer will not impede us. So with this very long posting, we want to remind you to wear your sunscreen and stop to smell the flowers. We love you!!Keep up the prayers.

More labs.....

This pretty much sums how I have felt today. I called the lab a couple of hours after I had my blood drawn, and they told my my creatnine levels were almost 1.7. This is bad. They were 1.5 last week when they said no treatment, they are supposed to be below 1.2. I called Dr. Grossman's office and talked to Karen (the nurse). I told her the numbers for the Creatnine, and then she went and checked the fax machine, and talked with Dr. Grossman, she called me back and said I needed to meet with Dr. Mcgregor, the nephrologist (kidney doctor) and informed me that I would be taken off of the list for coming in this weekend. This is really frustrating, because there is nothing I can do to fix it. It is totally out of my control. Which is a recurring pattern with this cancer stuff. Maybe there is a lesson here that God would like me to learn? I'll work on trying to figure that out later. But in the meantime I got a message at 5:30 on my home phone, how they got that number I will never know, that I need to get with Dr. Mcgregor, while my cel phone, which is practically attached to my hip, and its the only number I gave them to call me at, never rang. So I breath, and just keep breathing, hoping for more patience and less reminding that I am not in control. On a good note, it looks like I will be able to attend a day at the Andrew Family reunion, and then spend the 4th of July in the hospital (maybe), if my kidneys cooperate. I will keep on praying for patience to deal with this, keep smiling and trying to keep a positive outlook. I just looked at the clock and it's later than I would like to admit, but I have been too upset to write until now. Thanks for the prayers and thoughts in my behalf, if it wasn't for all of you and my family, I would have been overwhelmed long ago. My heart felt appreciation is not truly conveyable, but I truly love you all and am honored to make it to your personal communion with God. Merry Christmas and have a lovely day.
Love Andy.
PS. I am very aware that Peggy is a lot better writer than I am. She is a lot better at most things. I am truly lucky to have such a wonderful supportive Wife.

labs, labs, labs...

Andy was not feeling well yesterday, he had problems with his balance. He stayed home from work to try to rest and drink lots of water to help flush his body and try to get his kidneys working better. Today he was able to get up and get ready for work with little trouble. He is also going to the hospital to have his labs work done. This will then be sent to Dr. Grossman at Hunstman to deciede if Andy's kidney function is good enough to start IL2 on Sunday. Tomorrow we will have a conference call with the Docs to find out what they want to do. We are hoping that Andy will go on Sunday because otherwise this runs into our Florida trip. We want Andy to have every chance at beating this cancer, we also want to be able to go on this family vacation that so many have put time and effort into. If we have to postpone the trip the kids will understand. They are very good at not holding grudges about things don't go their way with postponed trips. Our kids are very patient. Yes, even Caity. They are learning how to look at a more eternal perspective of this life than just the here and now. I am proud of our kids. It is not easy trying to grow up with a parent that has to battle cancer. Andy does not have the energy or strength that he once did. And we were forced to give up some very important things, like horses. We sold two of them weeks after the diagnosis. We knew that things would be too difficult with them. We have kept our sweet Sue. She is an Arabian/appy cross. Some very wonderful nieghbors/friends have taken her up on their ranch for us until we can take her back. Last week, Andy took the girls up to their (Roche's) ranch to see her again. It has made us miss her more. Andy loves riding and working with horses, but the docs have advised that he does not ride or work them, not because of infections or anything like that. His balance is not its best and would cause an accident if he tried to ride. We are all hoping that next year will bring better days with our Suzy. Thankyou again to the Roche family for taking such great care of our horse. Thank you for all of your prayers and love.

Fathers day weekend

The kids went to Lava Hot Springs for the Verhaal annual outing. They had a blast, they went up Thursday and we went up Saturday to get them. It was really nice to see everyone. Fathers Day was kinda rough for me but we made it through and still had some times that were enjoyable. We went to my parents for dinner/supper, the last meal of the day (the clarification is for my Dad.) Tanya and Jonah came over and it was fun to see them. He is growing so much. Tanya is my little brother David's wife, Jonah is their son. ok, enough genealogy. It has been frustrating feeling sick still, but now we know why and it makes it more bearable and have a plan for getting over it. Water, water and a little more water, with some Gatorade, and cranberry juice. A little walking and lots of bathroom time. If all works well I should be back in shape for treatments by Thursday. If not, I will be making an appointment to go and see the kidney doctor. So lets hope and pray that all will be well by Thursday, that's when I have to do more labs. While putting treatment off for a week may seem like a setback, it just shows how much Dr. Grossman and the team care about my well being and success over cancer. They want me to get as many doses as I can and we all agree that under current circumstances I probably would have only got 1 maybe 2 doses before my body said no more. We take everything day by day and enjoy the little successes during each day that we have and endure the bad times. Thanks again for all the thoughts and prayers. Merry Christmas, and have a lovely day.
Love Andy.

hope floats

Today is a good day. Andy and I went to Huntsman and did the regular pre-admit check up with Dr. Grossman. Although Andy will not be admitted on Sunday to start the 2nd half of the 3rd series of IL2. We did find out that Dr. Grossman went to a national melanoma conference, and learned more about a drug that has shown a remarkable number of success in the battle against this form of aggressive cancer. We all know that we are not immortal, yet when you have been given an actual time line you tend to get excited when the experts tell you about another possible way to stay here on earth with the ones you love. I would love to give you the name of this treatment, but I can not even say it more or less write it. Plus we were not given specifics, just a little bit of hope for a new plan B. I guess you would like to know why Andy is not going in on Sunday for treatments. His labs came back showing that his kidneys are not functioning at an acceptable level to begin the treatments, so Dr. Grossman has delayed Andy's admit until next Sunday. Andy's recovery this time around has been slow compared to previous recovery times. His feeling of being extreme tired and sick to his stomach is due to dehydration and high creatnine levels in the kidneys. We were not surprised about the delay and we actually feel this will be better, and will allow Andy to have a better chance to recieve more doses. If you can not tell we are happy with this news. I hope you can tell how much the Dr.'s and staff at Huntsman really care about Andy and our family on a very real personal level. We are so thankful to them. They are always looking for ways to fight this cancer with Andy as partners in crime. We want you all to remember to keep a possitive attitude and know we love each of you and pray for you and your family. Keep up the prayers we always can use them. We really do feel your love, thoughts, and prayers. Thank you.

Tired, again

I went to work yesterday. Today I am recovering, just for the record, Cancer sucks!!! But the miracles, the blessings, the love and concern that has been showered upon us has made this a bearable, all be it not comfortable, situation. Through inspiration and people thinking of us, just this week we have had some wonderful things happen. My shed was re-tar papered where the wind ripped what we put down last fall (thanks Rob). We had a bunch of shingles dropped off at our house (thanks to the Scott Family). and some people that put them up for us (thanks Mom, Dad, and Josh.) All of this happened since Sunday. With nary a word from me. People have told me to just go sit down and stay out of the way, which right now is where I should be. But it doesn't make it easy for me to just watch others do things I used to be able to do fairly easy. Things are going well on the recovery side, I just need to remember that I got 5 doses this last time. The Doctor thinks I am crazy by going to work, but I feel like I have to do something when I feel better, and maybe getting more rest is the best answer. But going to work is sometimes more therapeutic than just sitting in a chair relaxing. You can only watch so much TV and reading is not a great option for me, my eyes don't work like they should, so reading is really hard. And at this point, my body doesn't need sleep all day and all night long. Although today I may end up taking a pain pill if the pain doesn't go away soon. I am hoping that I start to feel better sometime this afternoon. I will be taking it easy all day so I can go to work again tomorrow. Thanks, to all the caring Co-Workers, you guys and gals are awesome. We as a family pray for all of you on a daily basis. Thanks for your prayers and thoughts, may God bless you all today, and may you see the miracles in your life. Merry Christmas and have a lovely day.
Love Andy

Good morning

I woke up this morning having actually slept in my bed all night. This is boring for most of you, but for me, at this point it is quite an accomplishment. If I lay completely flat I have a tendency to stop breathing, (while I have the water weight on.) So I didn't need to sleep in the recliner. And Peggy didn't wake me up about midnight and say, "you, need to sleep in the other room, your breathing keeps stopping." At least that's the excuse she keeps giving me.
I will say I now have a lot more sympathy to the supervisors that stand around and watch people work. Whew!!! that is hard work. I watched my wife and kids dig holes and set fence posts yesterday, then went and took a nap I was so tired. It is amazing how much of a tole this IL2 puts on your body. I think it was just being upright and the little bit of walking around I did that wore me out. Recovery, like always has been slow but progressing.
Today I am finally below 240, and my legs and hands are not swollen anymore, so I guess I have gained a little weight over the last few weeks. My appetite is coming back and eating is more enjoyable than it used to be. Thanks to all who have brought in meals over the last while. They have been delicious.
All is quiet at the Layne home this morning. I can hear the second hand on the clock in the other room ticking away. The sun has yet to come up this morning but it looks like it is going to be a beaufitul day. I can hear the birds chirping through the window, and the cat wants to go out and try to eat them.
By the way, a HUGE thanks to Lisa and Georgia for helping us out with Reese, it has been a lifesaver for us here. I haven't heard from you so I assume that all is well. Anyway, I think I will be making some pancakes for the kids for breakfast. As always, Thank you for your prayers and thoughts. Merry Christmas, and have a lovley day.
Love Andy.

I may not have been totally forthcoming.

Ok, Here are somethings I didn't even tell my wife. (partly because I was not aware until later the following day.) On Monday I turned blue again, during, rigors. It seems lately that the first rounds are the most vicious. And have had a tendency (for me) to be the most dangerous. My blood pressure for the most part stayed fairly stable. I had to stop because of internal pressures on my liver and gall bladder. The weight gain I have is hard to deal with because of the pain that it causes, can't be helped other than passing it through. It is slowly coming off. I feel better today if I don't move at all, but that is one of the things I have to do to help getting the water weight gone. Movement on my part helps immensely. Thanks for the prayers and good thoughts to get me through this last series. Only one more to go before we have to draw a line in the sand and decide which is the better course of action. To proceed on this same course to no avail, or take a more drastic, more invasive, and life disrupting course. May your prayers be with us, as our's are with you. thank you, thank you very much. I can not express it enough.
Merry Christmas and have a lovely day.
Love Andy.

Today Andy called me around 6:00am, this is our usual morning talk time before the chaos begins. He is doing well, he is positive and upbeat. Around 2:30 he called to let me know they are done with this weeks treatments. He recieved 5 doses total, which is more than expected, but then you all know Andy(has to press his limits). He was really wanting to do 8 doses just to show Dr. Grossman that he could do it. I swear the more those two men are together the more I think their little boy, "I can do it better than you can" attitude comes out. Dr. Grossman will say, "Andy, if we can get 3 doses, that would be great." Andy's relpy is usually something to the effect, "If I'm down here for a week, I think 6 doses would be better." As if this is some kind of bargining/haggling item they are talking about. I am going to go down tomorrow to bring him home. He has gain 33 pounds of water and feels like the stay puff marshmellow man. There were no scares or problems this time around. The doctors/nurses were aggressive in predosing Andy before each treatment and this seems to help. I would like to clear up so things. On my post from last friday, I did mention that we needed some time to absorb info that was given to us. I feel as though I am in a more calm and understanding place and I can further explain so things. Andy and I have been very focused on these treatments to stop and reverse the growth of the tumors. The information from the scan from last week were not great. They did show growth, and this threw us for a loop. We really did not expect it, and we felt as though we were just told all over again of the statisic and real number we are facing with this cancer. Our happy place that we had been building during this last month was blown down by melanoma once again. But, yes there is a but, we are refocusing and accepting what lies ahead. This is not as easy as I make it sound. Life is never certian, but we all have expectataion and goals to how we are going to live it. At this time Andy and I don't see a clear and forward future. We are building it slowly one month at a time. Having said that, tomorrow is the last day of school for the kids, Andy is coming home (sick and bloated), and I have more time to try to get the yard to look nice for the summer. Another thing we are looking for to our vacation in July. Some month ago my sister Andee and her lovely hubby found a charitable group call Compassionate Partners. They help families with individuals of life threatening diseases to go on a family vacation. We are going to Florida, DisneyWorld, Universal Studios, Sea World, and the BEACH!! Yet, with my luck that muck flowing from the Gulf will make its way to where we will go and the beach will be closed. Pray that mother nature doesn't let this happen, I know that sound very selfish, but my kids have never seen an ocean at all. So we are all excited beyond belief. Thank you Andee, Rene, and those of Compassiontate Partners. We want to remind all of you how much we are grateful for your love and prayers. Thank YOU!!!!

On Sunday, we took Andy down to Huntsman to start the first week of the third series of treatments. This was hard on us all. You would think this would get easier the more you do this, it doesn't. Monday the started the Il2 at 1:00 pm. It was a slow start because of the lack of x-ray tech that were available. Before they start Il2 they must take an x-ray to make sure the line in okay. Things went well enough, he did have some problems with his blood pressure. They have decided to take this week slow. Possibly only one dose per day as long as Andy's body does okay. Today he had his dose around 9:30 am. We need everyone to say a prayer that the weeks and the second half of this series will reduce the tumors. Things are a bit shaking at this point and anything is much apprieciated. We love you and I will post an update tomorrow. Thank you